it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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