Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
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