Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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