I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
