sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
