You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize