We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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