kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
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Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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