Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
