the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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