Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
