what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
