I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
