I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
