4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
