He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
did i walk over a car last night?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Randomize
