I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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