i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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