i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
