drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
We just shotgunned beers for America
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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