when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize
