I think I died a long time ago.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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