Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Hippo gnu deer
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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