i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
