I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
