I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
