I am puke
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
