they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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