i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
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