"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
