Are we in a gay sports bar?
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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