Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??

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  (702): Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks?? http://tfl.nu/ct6g
  Replies (15) Good night (2824) Bad night (916)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie

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  (502): He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie http://tfl.nu/8h9i
  Replies (74) Good night (828) Bad night (7136)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened

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  (717): i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened http://tfl.nu/tpah
  Replies (13) Good night (6327) Bad night (1148)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again

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  (703): oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again http://tfl.nu/dw4b
  Replies (20) Good night (3827) Bad night (1214)
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  (581): View more from Quebec

  I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.

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  (581): I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset. http://tfl.nu/8lj9
  Replies (33) Good night (1435) Bad night (5765)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"

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  (724): she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it" http://tfl.nu/sq67
  Replies (9) Good night (5758) Bad night (1309)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.

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  (410): She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible. http://tfl.nu/n7ul
  Replies (18) Good night (5410) Bad night (1160)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.

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  (240): One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order. http://tfl.nu/2w08
  Replies (6) Good night (2217) Bad night (1041)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.

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  (360): We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent. http://tfl.nu/utkw
  Replies (8) Good night (3248) Bad night (1347)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.

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  (734): He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked. http://tfl.nu/9iel
  Replies (3) Good night (1094) Bad night (635)
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  (310): View more from California

  This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.

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  (310): This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to. http://tfl.nu/veao
  Replies (14) Good night (1079) Bad night (1474)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.

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  (917): Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays. http://tfl.nu/jpwh
  Replies (12) Good night (706) Bad night (1142)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.

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  (863): Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house. http://tfl.nu/4quh
  Replies (6) Good night (999) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'

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  (206): there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn' http://tfl.nu/cuy3
  Replies (1) Good night (507) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.

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  (856): I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick. http://tfl.nu/i37m
  Replies (5) Good night (776) Bad night (334)

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