what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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