Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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