You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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