oh god the rape fog is back!
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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