tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
