Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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