so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I love you.
Bad choice
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