i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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