Having a random hookup so left but love u
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
