she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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