Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
