think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
