Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Randomize