Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
