I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Randomize
