We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
