Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize