Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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