I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
