yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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