Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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