just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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